8 Reasons Why We Need a Bob’s Burgers Theme Park Land

Bob’s Burgers, the critically acclaimed animated TV show, just kicked off its 10th season on Fox. The show is hilarious (without being too crass or crude), smartly written, surprisingly wholesome and packed with burgers. But best of all for this coaster enthusiast, it’s set in a town with an amusement park pier. For these reasons and more, I believe a Bob’s Burgers theme park land is something that we need to make happen.

The premise of Bob’s Burgers is relatively straightforward: the Belchers — Bob, Linda, Tina, Gene and Louise — live in an apartment above Bob’s eponymous burger restaurant. Business is up and down — more down, sometimes — but the family makes the best of it, while regularly finding themselves in various shenanigans.

(If you need a more detailed primer on the show, this Bob’s Burgers Wiki is a great place to start.)

As a longtime fan of the show, I’ve often thought that Bob’s Burgers would make for a spectacular burger-inspired area of a theme park, similar to the Simpsons’ Springfield and The Simpsons Ride at Universal Studios Florida and Hollywood:

So, below are the reasons why I think the world needs a Bob’s Burgers theme park land.

1. The setting is made for a Bob’s Burgers theme park land.

Bob’s Burgers is surprisingly grounded in reality, especially for a cartoon. Much of the show takes place in a fictional, unnamed seaside town somewhere along the Jersey Shore. Think Seaside Heights.

Bob’s restaurant is located on Oceanside Drive, which dead-ends at the entrance to the Wonder Wharf pier, the town’s biggest attraction.

The seaside amusement park is essentially a recurring character on the show.

The pier alone has everything you would need in a theme park: fun rides, good food, games, merchandise — you get the idea. It’s the perfect fit for a theme park.

While we’re on the subject of rides…

2. There would be plenty of rides to choose from.

Roller coaster? Ferris wheel? Carousel? Yep, the Wonder Wharf pier has all of those and more. Theme park designers would have an entire catalog of Wonder Wharf rides at their disposal. These are just a few:

Scream-I-Cane

Arguably the most iconic of the Wonder Wharf attractions, Scream-I-Cane is a classic seaside wooden roller coaster with a twisted layout.

The coaster’s appearance has changed over the years, especially when the ride is used as a plot device.

It serves as a rite of passage for many pier-goers and thrill-seekers in training.

But Scream-I-Cane isn’t the only big-ticket attraction at Wonder Wharf:

Wonder Wheel

Of course, it wouldn’t be a seaside pier amusement park without a Ferris wheel providing unobstructed views of the ocean and the town.

The Wonder Wheel made its grand debut in the show’s pilot episode when Bob and Linda shared a romantic moment on the wheel.

I believe every theme park or amusement park should have a Ferris wheel of some kind, so any park lacking one would benefit from a Bob’s Burgers-inspired area.

Carousel

The pier’s carousel played a pivotal role in the two-part “Wharf Horse” and “World Wharf II” episode. When the pier’s future was threatened by the aspiring condo developer and brother of Wonder Wharf’s owner, Calvin Fischoeder, the Belcher children sprang into action to save it.

Unfortunately, the pier’s aging carousel was one of the first attractions on the chopping block. Eldest Belcher child/fearless preteen Tina (with the help of her mischievous, sometimes-sinister sister Louise) chained herself to “Mr. Goiter” to prevent workers from demolishing the beloved ride.

The horses’ names were perhaps more interesting than the ride itself: Lady Big Nose, Mr. Down There Hair, Harry Human Feet and Dr. Big Butt.

Queezy Queen

The Queezy Queen is a traditional tilt-a-whirl ride, often operated by the bank-robber-turned-carnival-worker, Mickey.

Scramble Pan

Much of the Thanksgiving-themed “Dawn of the Peck” episode took place on Wonder Wharf as a “running of the turkeys” race went awry after an aggressive hoard of turkeys, geese, ducks, and chickens swarmed the pier.

In the commotion, the Belcher kids and friends became stuck spinning on the “Scramble Pan” teacups-style ride.

From a roller coaster to a spinning ride themed to my favorite breakfast food, a Bob’s Burgers theme park land could offer enough rides to keep guests busy for an entire day.

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3. Character meet-and-greet opportunities.

I would unashamedly pay money just to get a picture with a real-life Belcher family. Add a theme park to the mix, and I’d be willing to pay double.

The Belchers’ relatively simple wardrobes make dressing like them very fairly easy. A theme park wouldn’t need to break the bank on lavish costumes or massive costume suits, although those would work as well.

All a park would need would be people who can rock these clothes and perhaps a wig and fake mustache. Note that the above graphic shows costumes for purchase by the general public. A theme park (and devout Bob’s Burgers fans) could do so much better.

And there are plenty of characters from the Bob’s Burgers playbook who could roam the streets…

…such as Louise’s nightlight/confidant Kuchi Kopi, who has his own fan following.

Even the shortly lived mechanical shark from the 80s film, The Deepening, would make for a fun photo opportunity.

Needless to say, there would be plenty of sights to see when not on the rides.

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4. Bob’s Burgers apparel and merchandise is in high demand.

You can’t own too much Bob’s Burgers merchandise. My collection includes the Bob’s Burgers burger cookbook, t-shirts, a puzzle, calendar and much more.

I could write a list as long as the Scream-I-Cane about all of the Bob’s Burgers branded goodies floating around in stores and online. Unfortunately, there isn’t one particular place that has a huge, diverse supply of Bob’s merch.

However, the gift shop inside a Bob’s Burgers theme park land gift shop would be the ideal place to stock up on everything from coffee mugs to the below vehicle sunshade that I’ve been on the verge of buying for two years:

Bob’s Burgers fans love to support and rep the show, so a park could make a significant amount of dough on retail alone.

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5. Think of all the burgers.

While a Bob’s Burgers theme park land would undoubtedly need rides, food, characters and merchandise, the area wouldn’t be complete without one thing: burgers, and lots of them.

Imagine walking into a recreation of the actual Bob’s Burgers restaurant. Sure, it might need to be expanded or reconfigured to accommodate theme-park sized crowds, but it’s totally doable.

The restaurant could offer a rotating “Burger of the Day” just like on the show.

Employees would dress as their favorite character: Bob behind the grill, Linda taking orders, Tina refilling the napkin dispenser, Gene in the burger suit, Louise…plotting her next money-making scheme.

And though I would rather eat at Bob’s, the pier could offer popular amusement park grub.

 

The food stands would offer culinary staples such as hot dogs, nachos, fried dough, and snow cones from the probably-a-criminal Sally the Snow Cone lady.

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6. You don’t have to know the show.

Even guests who aren’t familiar with the show would still be able to enjoy a Bob’s Burgers theme park land.

Because at the end of the day, it would be an area themed to a beachside town and an amusement pier with rides, food, games and entertainment. But there would still be plenty of opportunities for designers to insert specific references to the show for die-hard Belcher fans. Just look at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.

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7. The Belchers are family-friendly.

One of the things that I love most about Bob’s Burgers is that it’s hilarious while not being too crude to watch with the family.

While the vulgarity of many adult cartoons (I won’t name names) wouldn’t translate well to an all-ages theme park, Bob’s Burgers has remained for the most part the mildest of the bunch.

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8. With each new season comes new source material.

With a feature film slated for release next summer, Bob’s Burgers shows no signs of slowing down.

Even in this week’s season 10 premiere, we were treated to a closer look at the local water park, “Wetty, Set, Go:”

The possibilities are limited only to the minds of the show’s creators.

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What ideas do you have for a Bob’s Burgers theme park area?

Share in the comments below!

Tags: bobs burgerscartoonswonder wharf